Awakening
by BeantownGleek
Summary: Set about 6 years after graduation in the Glee universe. Quinn, now going by Lucy is engaged. Her fiancee takes her to a Broadway showing of Spring Awakening in which Rachel is now starring. Will their feelings for each other also awaken?
1. Chapter 1

Quinn Fabray runs her hands down the folds of her dress and glances at herself in the mirror one final time. Satisfied, she switches off the light and heads for the door. She has been looking forward to this evening. It's been a somewhat stressful trip so far – not by dint of anything that's actually happened, but just from the nervousness and anticipation that has been building up within her ever since they made plans to visit David's parents in Connecticut. It has actually gone well – the Cabot's were very hospitable, she herself was charming and she's _almost_ positive they have quite taken to her. David and she left for New York City on Sunday after the early morning service followed by a light lunch. It feels good to be by themselves again. She has definitely been wound up a little tightly over the weekend and can feel herself relaxing. David has planned a surprise treat for her – a Broadway musical followed by dinner and she's finally able to get excited about it.

* * *

><p>She smiles up at David and accepts the arm he has extended for her as she steps out of the cab.<p>

"_Now_, are you going to tell me what we're watching?" she asks in mock exasperation.

"Just around the corner, you'll see it in a minute…" he says, laughing. "Although, I guess I could blind-fold you …"

She comes to an abrupt halt, the rejoinder frozen on her lips as she finds herself face to face with the Eugene O'Neill Theater and catches her first glimpse at the name of the show. She doesn't know much about Broadway, but she _does_ know one or two things about _this_ show.

"Well, come on!" David is tugging at her arm impatiently "We have front row seats. The lead actress is really hot and she's supposed to be half naked through half the show. I wanted to make sure you didn't miss out." he says, leeringly.

"Topless. And in one scene." she thinks mechanically, and she bites her lip when her mind completes that with a "And yes, she is"

* * *

><p>When the final refrain of "<em>Mamma who bore me<em>" is done, Quinn realizes that her mouth is open and that she has been holding her breath.

"She's gotten even better" she thinks with a slight shock, and then shakes her head. This is Rachel Berry we're talking about, and a Rachel Berry who has spent four years at Tisch at that. Of course she's gotten better.

She fidgets with her purse, praying that she isn't visible from stage. From the start of the show, she's sort-of held her handkerchief in front of her face hoping that will make it harder for Rachel to recognize her. Curse David for bringing her to the one show she was hoping to avoid. And curse her for not having come and watched this earlier; how could she have missed out on this for so many years?

It does not help that she has to watch Jesse St. James make love to Rachel. She had heard that Rachel was playing opposite him, but watching the two of them together just transports Quinn back to junior year and all the drama surrounding the prom.

Wendla's pregnancy and "_Whispering_" are the hardest to get through. The lyrics are deeply personal to her and Rachel brings so much passion to them that it's impossible to not think of her own "History" and Beth. It takes all her strength to stop herself from sobbing – and she isn't able to prevent a few stifled choking sounds from escaping from her throat. She's aware that David is glancing at her from time to time. She rarely, if ever, cries, but quite a few people in the audience are sniffing at this point, so she's reasonably confident that he won't think it too odd. Still, she knows she can't give in to the tears because once the flood-gates open, there will be no stopping them.

She's openly crying by the end. Seeing Wendla's grave was the last straw, though she can't quite make out whether it's because she's seeing herself in Wendla or she can't deal with the thought of Rachel being dead. David slips an arm around her and smiles gently.

She feels the buzz before she hears it. "Shit" David exclaims softly as he gropes around for his phone. Quinn feels warm around the neck, knowing that they are probably getting a few glares. David mumbles a "Sorry" and puts it on mute. He leans over and whispers to Quinn "I've gotta get this, babe. I'm going to run out when they're doing the curtain call. I'll see you outside?" She nods at him and relaxes back in to her chair. She realizes belatedly that her face is still wet and dabs at it forlornly with her handkerchief, smudging her now very runny eye-liner in the process.

David scrambles out as soon as the applause begins. On the verge of following him out, she turns for a final look at the stage…

… Only to find Rachel Berry's smiling face looking down at her.

* * *

><p>"So, Berry, you've done good! You're living the dream" she tosses out, as casually as she can manage. Rachel just smiles at her for a minute while efficiently working on getting rid of her make-up before glancing down at the ring on Quinn's finger and saying "Thanks Quinn, it looks like you are too."<p>

Quinn flushes deep and says in a low voice "Lucy. I've gone back to using Lucy."

She pauses expecting a flurry of questions and is a little surprised when they don't come. Her eyes wander around Rachel's dressing room, her fingers playing with the clasp on her purse nervously. She had been about to leave when the stage hand had reached her and told her that Ms. Berry was requesting that she join her in her dressing room; it was the one at the end of the hall with the gold star.

"His name is David" she continues eventually when Rachel doesn't break the silence "He's a financial consultant in L.A. and we're here on work for a couple of weeks. I mean he's working and I decided to tag along. And to meet his family." Quinn suppresses a strong urge to strangle herself. "I should go, he's probably waiting outside for me…" she says as she rises to her feet; only to find Rachel's hands on hers, gently, but firmly pulling her back down. "Quinn… Lucy. Please sit. I've sent Jeremy out with a note for David; he should be joining us as soon as he's done with his call."

Quinn sits back down. "You were amazing." she says belatedly.

Rachel smiles at her. "Thanks. I was really happy to see you in the audience today."

"When did you see me?" Quinn inquires out of curiosity.

"A few minutes into the first act. I have a habit of scanning the first couple of rows during performances."

"_Whispering_ was particularly good"

Rachel says nothing, but tightens her grip on Quinn's hands – which comes as a shock to Quinn, because she hadn't realized that Rachel is still holding her hands.

There's a knock on the door to which Rachel absently responds with a "Come in" without turning around.

"Are you planning to see Beth…?" she begins but stops when Quinn rises, flushed, pulling her hands free in the process.

"David!"

David walks in with a "Hello, Hello! You didn't tell me you knew Ms. Berry, Luce!" and then, turning to Rachel with an outstretched hand "David. I'm a big fan, Ms. Berry" which makes Quinn wince a bit at the embellishment.

Rachel flashes a big smile at him and says "Rachel. Thanks so much, David, I'm so happy you enjoyed the show!", finally giving Quinn a glimpse of the Rachel she has expected to see for the last 15 minutes.

"So how do you know each other?"

"We were at high school together…" Quinn replies.

"Wow, Luce, you might have told me you went to school with Rachel Berry!" he exclaims.

Sensing Quinn's discomfort, Rachel interjects "Well you know how it is with high school! You want to forget you even went as soon as it's over!"

"So I take it Beth is some old school friend. I didn't know you knew anyone in New York, Luce"

Quinn responds quickly without meeting Rachel's eyes "Yes. We haven't been in touch."

Rachel continues to smile and work on swabbing her face.

Quinn presses on "Sweetie, shouldn't we get going if we want to keep our dinner reservation?"

David looks at his watch and frowns "Crap, we're late."

He then brightens and turns to Rachel "I know! Why don't you join us for dinner, Rachel? We have reservations at Kraft. You two can catch up on old times."

Rachel watches Quinn freeze out of the corner of her eye before turning to David and smiling. "Thanks David, but I can't. I have a work related appointment that I must keep." She turns to her dresser and scribbles a number on a scrap of paper which she hands to Quinn "I'm off-work tomorrow and have a late start the rest of the week. Give me a call if you're bored and want to hang out."

Then, addressing both of them, "Have a pleasant dinner and I hope you enjoy your stay in my lovely city. It was very nice to meet you David and great catching up with you again Lucy!"

She turns her face so David can kiss her cheek and hugs Quinn very briefly before they leave.


	2. Chapter 2

Rachel puts down her cotton swabs with a thoughtful expression. There's a familiar feeling in the pit of her stomach, which she can identify (or at least, she thinks she can), but not explain. She's had other friends from high school attend her shows. Kurt and Blaine, of course. Brittany and Santana. Even Finn made it out to one of her off-Broadway performances along with Burt and Carol. She's always been excited to have people she knows watch the show. It gives her a sense of pride and accomplishment, but also happiness to have someone care enough to share in the realization of her dreams.

But this was different.

Rachel cannot explain the flush of anticipation she felt when she first spotted Quinn in the audience. And even if she can dismiss the surge of affection she felt on meeting her as a side-effect of the emotional high she's always on at the end of every performance, she cannot think of anything that could possibly justify the sharp feeling of disappointment she felt on seeing the engagement ring on Quinn's finger. Surely, this wasn't how she felt in high school? Rachel casts her mind back to all the interactions she's had with Quinn over the years. She winces at the thought of all that ridiculous fighting they did over a boy neither of them cared about – well, that's not quite true, Rachel was infatuated with Finn in their sophomore year and actively worked to sabotage his relationship with Quinn. She feels a little embarrassed about it now, and then guilty, because it made life significantly harder for Quinn during undoubtedly the most difficult part of her life. Rachel clearly remembers the shock she felt when she first heard that Quinn was living in the Puckerman's basement and wishes heartily that she had the courage to stick with her first instinct which was to ask Quinn to move into the Berry's spare room instead. She distinctly remembers Quinn in the Choir room during those days, eyes somewhat glazed over, without the heart to erect her habitual barbed wire fences. She remembers singing "_I feel pretty_" with her. At that point, she had sensed rather than known that Quinn was in a place where she felt the same sense of rejection and loneliness that Rachel did; it had taken her up to junior year to finally recognize it. She remembers junior prom, standing in the ladies room with Quinn, wiping away her tears and – and there it is! The sense of a common bond, a rush of affection, a strong desire to hold Quinn in her arms and make all her pain go away. A desire to wipe her tears, stroke her hair, and, and…

Wait, what? Kiss her lips?

A small gasp escapes Rachel's lips when all her feelings from that day seven years ago come rushing back to her. She knows she cannot deny it anymore, no more than she could deny her feelings for Jenelle at Tisch.

A knock followed by a loud "Hey Rayberry!" forces her back to the present. She manages a "Hey yourself, Saintjimmy" while smacking his hand as he tries to tousle her hair.

"I saw your cheerleader friend, something-or-the-other leaving the theater. Thought you should know."

"Lucy Fabray and her fiancée" Rachel replies, relieved that she won't have to explain the change of name to him. "I met up with them before they left."

"Ah!" Jesse says, but he's clearly already lost interest. "Do you want to go have dinner?"

"Can't today, I'm meeting with Ryan Murphy about the TV project he has in mind."

Jesse's eyes light up. "I'd forgotten about that; remember to put in a word for me!"

"I will Dodo, now get out so I can change into some real clothes so I can actually keep my appointment."

Jesse stoops in an exaggerated bow, then rushes in and tips Rachel's chair backward to such a degree that it has her gasping and swinging her arms to try and keep her balance. He sniggers loudly at the stream of invective that bursts from her lips and strides out of the door, slamming it loudly behind him.

Rachel glowers at the door for a few moments while clutching her heart which is beating wildly, then sighs and gets up to head home.


	3. Chapter 3

Quinn picks up the phone for the seventh time that morning before putting it down again. She sits with the phone in her lap for a minute, then picks it up for an eight time and punches in the numbers. Then, before she can change her mind, she hits dial. She exhales, and waits – but not for long as it turns out, because there's a voice on the phone almost as soon as it starts ringing.

"Hello?"

"Rachel? This is… uh…"

"Lucy. How, was Kraft?"

Quinn blinks. "Umm… it was great."

She pauses "How was your work appointment?"

There's an enthusiastic response on the other end which she only partially listens to. There's a short pause after Rachel stops speaking and then she begins again tentatively

"Listen" she says "I don't want to take up your time because I know you're busy, but I was wondering if you'd like to meet up for brunch or something today"

"Sorry, I can't do brunch…" says the voice from the other end.

A small, disappointed "Oh" escapes Quinn's lips before she can stop it.

"...because I've already had breakfast and it is now past noon!" Quinn can hear Rachel tittering softly at the other end

"But if you want to do lunch, I can meet you in 15 minutes in your hotel lobby."

* * *

><p>She spots Rachel, hair pulled back tightly in a ponytail standing at a table idly scanning through a magazine. She's wearing skinny jeans and a cobalt blue polo; her hands are in her back pockets and she's swiveling slightly from side to side. Quinn figures she's probably humming to herself, and sure enough her lips are moving in a way that makes Quinn smile despite herself.<p>

Rachel suddenly spots her out of the corner of her eye and swings around, with a broad smile on her face. She has managed to pull her hands out of her pockets in the process and is now sort of holding them out in front of her, but still facing downward like they're resting on a bike handle-bar or something.

Quinn isn't quite sure what to do with her own hands or how to greet her, but Rachel grabs her hands enthusiastically with her own outstretched ones, still beaming up at her in a way that suddenly makes her feel welcome.

The simple, clean look and especially the ponytail make her look ridiculously young, but also suit her tiny frame a lot. Quinn suddenly feels over-dressed in her red cocktail dress.

"Careful, don't set anything on fire!" Rachel says, giving her the once over and then dramatically exhaling and fanning herself. That makes Quinn blush but Rachel just smiles and grabs her hand.

"Come on; let's go paint the town that sinful color you're wearing!"

* * *

><p>Lunch turns out to be a simple affair in a small family-run Middle Eastern restaurant, which Quinn finds a little surprising. It's clearly not a large staff, but Rachel appears to know them all fairly intimately as evidenced by the fact that each of them makes the time to come out to spend a couple of minutes chatting with her even though the restaurant is fairly busy. Rachel introduces her each time as "My friend, Lucy from Los Angeles" and she politely smiles and shakes their hand each time.<p>

"I've been told the Lamb Shawarma is to die for" Rachel says, tugging her menu down a little bit so that their eyes can meet "and the Hummus and Labaneh are the best you'll find east of the West Bank."

"Or so, I've been told" she adds laughing, "Can't say I've been."

Quinn puts her menu down with some surprise. "Is this a Palestinian restaurant?"

Rachel looks her in the eyes, shrugs and says "They're just a family caught in the middle of a conflict they didn't have any role in starting and have no hope of stopping."

There's a long pause and then Quinn asks suddenly "Labaneh? Aren't you vegan anymore?"

Rachel smiles at her and doesn't say anything for a minute, and then briefly "Salem makes me a vegan version"

She pauses, and then continues "But I'm closer to vegetarian at this point – although I still only primarily consume dairy and eggs from farms I've visited and trust."

"It was hard to be vegan and attend 'wine-downs' when the only thing on the menu was cheese. For me, that meant wine and no food – which led to some … interesting experiences"

Quinn looks at Rachel, but she's just smiling to herself so she can't really get a read.

"So I started cheating a little with the cheese, which led to other dairy – most of which left me feeling guilty. I heard of a CSA that did dairy and non-fertilized eggs from free-range, low-density, grass-fed animals that were not used for meat, so I went down to the farm that they sourced from and checked out the animals. Once convinced that they, in fact, lived a happier life than I did, I felt better about consuming dairy…"

To her surprise, Quinn finds herself smiling – no, that was probably closer to a grin! It was a very Rachel Berry answer, and yet, in some strange way that she can't quite figure out, it wasn't.

She looks up to see Rachel watching her closely.

"Where did you go?" she asks quietly, but pointedly.

Quinn pauses.

"You've changed" she says slowly.

"But I can't quite put my finger on how"

Rachel grins at her and then says, mischief written all over face, "Well, you have a couple of weeks to find out"

* * *

><p>Quinn is surprised at how good lunch has been – and not just the food, which was nothing short of sensational – but just how pleasant and generally <em>nice<em> it has been to sit and talk with Rachel about… well whatever they talked about for the two whole hours it took them to finally get done. Everything, it would seem but the stuff she thought she had actually come to talk about – and that makes her tense up.

Quinn realizes that Rachel's already taken care of the check and she's just sitting there looking at her silently. Rachel smiles when she makes eye contact.

"Hello again" she says, but it's playful rather than demanding.  
>Quinn doesn't say anything; she's still trying to work out how to approach this and the tension in her face is showing.<p>

Rachel sighs.

"I'm not going to tell anyone that you're back to being Lucy, Quinn. And I'm sure as hell not going to tell your fiancée that you have a daughter – who's also my step-sister."

Quinn flushes this time and drops her eyes – which are rapidly filling up, for the second time in as many days – to her hands which are tapping nervously on the table.

"That _is_ what's bothering you, right?" asks Rachel – and suddenly, there are a pair of hands on hers, soft and comforting.

Quinn finally looks up and dabs her eyes with the napkin Rachel is holding up.

"How did you know?" she asks quietly.

"I spent four years with you Quinn, and even though we weren't the best of friends, I did get to know and understand you a little bit."

"Look" she continues, "All that's history okay? And while it's true that I would like to talk with you about this sometime, I recognize that you're not at a point where you want to talk about it, not with me at least, and may never be. So let's just shelve this for whenever you are. For now, I'm going to go back to calling you Lucy, so that I don't accidentally screw up in front of David. You can pretend I'm the friend you deserved but never had in High School. How's that for a deal?"

Quinn laughs, but nods her head. Suddenly, she's looking forward to the next two weeks, even though it's likely she's going to see very little of David during the time.

* * *

><p>Rachel drags her to Central Park after lunch.<p>

"Even though you're not dressed for it, the colors are going to be a good match for your mood" she says. Quinn's not sure what that means, she's just thankful that she's wearing flats rather than wedges.

"I just love the idea of a park in the middle of a city" Rachel says. "It's like someone had the bright idea that since we were all too busy to go out and spend time with nature, they would just bring nature to us."

"Hey look, there's a buggy!" Quinn exclaims "Would it be too touristy to ride in one?"

She notices that Rachel has fallen silent. Rachel finally looks back at her with a small smile and says "Yes, but it's not that; it's just… I kind of have a problem with this whole horse-drawn carriage thing. The horses are over-worked and malnourished – and quite a few of them have collapsed and even died…"

She sighs, "I know, kooky Rachel – but this is just something I feel strongly about."

Quinn is thoughtful for a moment, and then says "I guess you always were good at caring for … things… that couldn't take care of themselves, but from what I've seen so far, the new Rachel doesn't feel that she needs to apologize for it so I don't know why you would start now."

She is rewarded with a dazzling smile that stops her heart for a second.

* * *

><p>"Ok. Choices:" says Rachel.<p>

Quinn, who has been peering through the taxi window, turns to face her.

"We can either join my cast at their regular hang-out – we have a standing Monday date, whoever makes it, makes it – or go clubbing on our own, or hang out at my apartment – I can cook up some pasta for dinner."

Quinn is somewhat surprised because she had assumed that their day together was at an end and she would have to fend for herself for dinner.

"Rachel, you've already spent half a day baby-sitting me, I don't want to impose…" she begins.

Rachel gives her a funny look, and then says seriously "Look Lucy, I'm spending time with you because I want to. As long as the same holds for you, we're good and you don't have to feel guilty or awkward."

When Quinn nods slowly, she continues

"I'm pretty light on commitments this week and I personally would like to spend as much time as I can on getting reacquainted with you. If you're amenable to that, I can figure out stuff for us to do over the week so you get to see New York without having to go hang out at the tourist traps by yourself, okay?"

Quinn nods again, this time with more conviction.

"The third option then" she says after a pause. "I would much rather spend time alone with you than in a group."

She stiffens as soon as she realizes what she's just said and bites her lip. Rachel doesn't seem to have noticed though, because she just smiles and says "In that case, I need to amend our destination; we simply *must* stop at Eataly to pick up some fresh Pappardelle and wine and maybe some cheese for you."

Quinn goes back to looking outside the window as Rachel communicates the new destination to the driver.

* * *

><p>"How can I help?" asks Quinn accepting the glass of Barbera that's been thrust into her hands along with a plate of Piave Vecchio and Membrillo.<p>

"Just make yourself comfortable; I've got this one. I know real estate is your thing, so feel free to poke around the apartment."

Quinn does as suggested. The apartment is small – though not particularly so by Manhattan standards – and lightly furnished. The living room has floor to ceiling windows facing south and west that let in a lot of light. There's a little balcony that she steps out on to so that she can peer down at the traffic below.

A tiny sectional frames the entertainment area which has a couple of large Thiels surrounding a wall-mounted TV. Rachel has put up posters from her favorite musicals, Broadway and Hollywood – West Side Story, Les Miserables, and Funny Girl; there's even a smaller Spring Awakening poster semi-hidden away in a corner.

The kitchen is reasonably sized for a small apartment, with a window along its length that opens into the living room where a couple of bar-stools create a breakfast nook. From the way Rachel is making herself busy, it's clear that it's well used. Rachel is humming as she alternates between chopping, stirring and sipping on her wine.

"I thought the cheese was for me, Berry" Quinn feels relaxed enough to tease Rachel.

"Cheese is my one big weakness" she confesses. "That's the one thing that can sometimes make me regret veganism. And it's not like other dairy, I can't just source my way out of my morality concerns."

Quinn wanders into the bedroom, which is more or less occupied by a large bed. The room is more intimate, mauve walls with pictures on frames – pictures of Rachel with her dads, pictures with the SA cast, Glee club pictures from McKinley, pictures from Tisch including several intimate looking pictures with a pretty young red-headed girl with a slightly upturned nose and a perennially mischievous expression. Quinn stops and stares at them for a while. The two of them look like they're very close and Rachel looks happy in the pictures, she thinks with an incomprehensible but unmistakable flash of jealousy. Quinn finally tears her eyes off and moves on… to a picture of a five year old hugging Rachel. A blonde, hazel-eyed five-year old with a dazzling smile.

A sound escapes Quinn's lips as she feels her legs give. She can't figure out what happens next, but when she comes to her senses, there are two strong arms around her waist and someone's whispering "I've got you, sweetie" into her ear.


	4. Chapter 4

Rachel surveys the remains of her dinner, and by extension, her day. The pasta has turned in to an inedible mush and her sauce has burned and bubbled over onto the stove. There are fragments of glass all over her kitchen floor and a new stain on her carpet.

She sits at her little pull out table and covers her eyes with the palms of her hands. The day had gone brilliantly until that point. Quinn had opened up; through a combination of charm and honesty, Rachel had managed to get past her not-so-prickly-any-longer shell. Rachel was sure that it wasn't just her; it had really felt like Quinn was enjoying talking to and getting close to Rachel. She had been very serious about being Quinn's friend and it had looked like Quinn was going to permit her to try.

She had just dropped the pasta into the stock pot, humming "Happy Days are Here Again" – the Barbra version – when she had heard Quinn cry out. She had shot out of the kitchen dropping her wine glass in the process. She had found Quinn in the bedroom staring at an old picture of Beth, on the verge of collapsing. Rachel had gotten to her just in time. Quinn looked like she was having a panic attack; Rachel had just held onto her gently and talked to her in as soothing a voice as she could muster. When she felt she could, she had walked her to an armchair and Quinn had sat down heavily into it. Rachel had leaned down in front of her, started doing a loud 5-2-5 breathing exercise herself and put her right hand on Quinn's stomach, pressing down gently on the exhale and releasing pressure on the inhale to demonstrate what she wanted Quinn to do. Quinn had understood and followed her lead. She let up after a couple of cycles when Quinn looked physically better, but completely mortified.

"I'm ... sorry" she had muttered "I don't know what came over me."

Rachel said nothing. She had put her hand gently on Quinn's shoulder, but taken it off right away when Quinn had shuddered violently.

"Sorry" Quinn said again.

"I … really should … go" she said finally.

Rachel bit her lip, the concern showing on her face, but she nodded "Can I drop you back Quinn?"

"Don't _call_ me that!" the words came out ragged and harsh.

Rachel rushed out an apology, but Quinn continued to breathe hard.

"I'll… just go. I'm sure I can get a taxi"

Rachel had helped her to her feet, and then let go of Quinn though her right hand was poised to move to Quinn's back if needed.

She had taken the elevator down with Quinn, though Quinn had looked restless and annoyed through the ride. Quinn had taken off as soon as they reached the lobby mumbling "I'll walk down till I find a taxi, bye."

Rachel had just watched her rapidly receding back till it turned the corner and then gone back up, numb and heavy.

* * *

><p>Rachel hauls herself out of the chair and heads to her bedroom. She goes down, face first into her bed. Then, holding a pillow against her face, she bursts into tears.<p> 


End file.
